"Reality Has A Liberal Bias"

This is a post by a guy I know online - reprinted with his permission, but with identifying info removed. I like it very much; I thought you might, too.

Well we had our usual Halloween spectacular on the block, with an election year twist. We had [redacted] and [redacted], Democratic Senate and House candidates respectively, show up. Our neighborhood does a full tilt cooperative Halloween blowout, organized by our local State Rep, [redacted], who lives for Halloween. He gives out both candy and books to kids, has scary story readings from his front porch every hour on the hour, and, this year, got some funding from the neighborhood association to buy extra candy and distribute it to everyone in the neighborhood, since a typical house here ends up giving out a hundred bucks plus worth of candy every year.

So, with him being a politician, and with mobs of kids and families having fun, we attracted more politicians. The knot of people in suits, and press with the video cameras, stood out among the assorted costumed kids, and they were going door to door, meeting with people, etc. There was also a parade of sorts down the street, with a firetruck and a truck towing a flatbed with a big Obama/Biden sign done by a local artist I know. It was a very cool billboard design, actually. It has a sort of early 60s JFK-ish graphic design. And there were the get out the vote people, of course.

So, fun for all, but also a very weird collision of Halloween and politics. Not a Republican to be seen, but that's typical for this neighborhood. We've got two of them on the block, I think, and this year both of them are going for Obama, even the asshole cop who lives next door.

Actually, he's finally become not an asshole. When he first moved here he had a chip on his shoulder like you wouldn't believe, and routinely bullied people. I successfully neutered him, though, through a combination of talking to his superiors and organizing the neighborhood against some of his behaviour, and after that he actually started to come around as a decent enough guy.

I think this neighborhood actually makes liberals out of people. We get conservatives moving in here from time to time, but after a few years they turn into liberals. I think it's the fact that we've got rich people, poor people, black people, brown people, white people, old people, young people, single people, married people, gay people, straight people, and just plain all sorts of people living in a neighborhood that was designed on late 19th century/early 20th century planning, so that there are small yards, closely spaced houses, no garages, and you can comfortably talk to your neighbors or people passing by from your front porch, and almost all houses have big front porches. The result is that everyone gets to know each other, and so we band together for parties and holidays, and we help each other out with changing tires or jumpstarting cars, or shoveling snow, or raking leaves, and we're 90%+ liberals to begin with. The few conservatives who venture here slowly become assimilated because suddenly different sorts of people aren't so strange, and the idea of pulling together as community seems normal instead of weird, and before they even realize it, they're one of us.

Reality does have a liberal bias, and when architecture and urban planning conspires to place people more firmly into the reality of the people around them, and not buried somewhere behind a large lawn, a courtyard wall, in the "media room" in the center of the house, plugged in to Fox News, suddenly they realize they've been a liberal all along, and that the values that they thought they supported as Republicans, values such as community, family, prosperity, and security, are actually really Democratic values. The only difference is that we mean these things for everyone, and we realize that we must accomplish them together, or not at all. Prosperity for some and poverty for others is not prosperity when you have a connection to a mixed community, and, whether you realize it or not, you do have such a connection. Security doesn't mean walls and fences and weapons, it means good neighbors who keep in touch with each other and watch out for each other, and it doesn't matter what race, class, or religion those neighbors are, all that matters is that you help each other out because you're in it together. Community isn't a self-selected group of white evangelicals in a mega-church, or a self-selected group of the well-to-do in a gated community, it's whoever happens to be around at that moment and whoever lives next door. Families aren't just a working father, a stay at home moms, and 2.4 kids in the suburbs, it might be the retired widower next door whose grown son lives with him, along with the son's girlfriend and her child from a former marriage, or a lesbian couple and their kids, or whatever. Families take all shapes, and all lives are equally valid and human.

When you deal with the full spectrum of humanity, and you find that we all really want the same things, suddenly the Republican politics of division and fear start to sound insane.

So, a notice for Republicans out there from us weird liberals: you will be assimilated, and you'll actually really enjoy it. We like everyone. Y'all are invited, regardless of ideological differences. We throw great parties and we're fun to be around. Once you get to know us your psychological armor will fall off and you'll feel ten years younger and fifty pounds lighter. A sense of community that covers all kinds of people is the gateway drug to liberalism, so go on, try it. You'll like it. Trust me.

Don't vote against McCain for the color of his skin

Excerpt from Real Time with Bill Maher - New Rules: September 26, 2008:

New Rule: A candidate for president should not be judged by the color of his skin. And to - and to anyone who thinks differently, I say, please do not reject John McCain just because he's white. I think the recent news from Wall Street has made us all less tolerant, and only reinforced the stereotype that white people are shiftless, thieving welfare queens.

Now, take a look at these pictures. Here are the CEO's of Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac, AIG and the Lehman Brothers. I know the first thing that jumps out about these faces is they all happen to be white, and they all happen to be responsible for stealing. But, what you have to understand is that these whites are a product of a society that made them that way.

It was the neighborhoods and the schools they went to: Harvard, Yale, the Wharton School of Business.

They never learned the value of doing real, actual work. And the first step to fixing that is better role models so kids growing up white today don't think the only way out of Westchester is corporate crime.

Or a government handout. Or sailing.

So, I get it. The temptation is to look at McCain and vote against him because you don't see an individual; you just see another typical welfare "whitey."

And it's true. He spent his entire life shuffling from one low-paying government job to another. Well, except those years he spent in prison. Typical. And, between you and me, he's not very articulate.

Oh, he may have some street smarts, but he's not what you'd call an "educated" man. He freely admits he's ignorant about the economy. And apparently the only thing his white running mate knows how to do is crank out one baby after another.

And now, of course, her teenage is pregnant out of wedlock, because she learns it at home!

But, that doesn't mean we should assume all white people are like that just because so many of them are. I believe there is hope. I believe even the stupidest, greediest, laziest whites can break the cycle of dependence, like this November when we finally move George Bush out of public housing.

But do they match the carpet?

From the good folks at icanhascheezburger.com